Hilarious Jokes to Lighten Your Mood

Laughter is undoubtedly good for your health. Sometimes, however, it is hard to break a smile. Monday mornings at work come to mind. Well, here are some quotes that can tackle even the Monday morning blues.

1. Rodney Dangerfield - My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.

2. Paul Ehrlich - To err is human, but to really foul things up you need a computer.

3. Steven Wright - The hardness of the butter is proportional to the softness of the bread.

4. Jay Leno - Dick Cheney says he loves California - out here the rich and famous can shoot people and get away with it. Wait till these Enron guys find out that in prison, the term "Insider trading" has a whole new meaning.

5. Dave Attell - You know, men and women are a lot alike in certain situations. Like when they're both on fire - they're exactly alike

6. Steven Wright - To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.

7. Rodney Dangerfield - My wife was afraid of the dark...then she saw me naked and now she's afraid of the light.

8. George Bush - The only way we can win is to leave before the job is done.

9. Bill Maher - Kids. They're not easy. But there has to be some penalty for sex.

10. Rodney Dangerfield - I could tell that my parents hated me. My bath toys were a toaster and a radio.

11. Jerry Seinfield - Where lipstick is concerned, the important thing is not color, but to accept God's final word on where your lips end.

12. Jay Leno - Al Gore has found a new job - teach journalism at Columbia University. Ironic isn't it? The guy who did all the coke winds up going to the White House, the guy who didn't do coke goes to Columbia.

13. Dave Attell - Man, you've gone from social drinker to alcoholic really quickly.

14. Jay Leno - In California, 50 women protested the impending war with Iraq by lying on the ground naked and spelling out the word 'peace.' Right idea, wrong president.

15. Bill Cosby - A word to the wise ain't necessary -- it's the stupid ones that need the advice.

At the end of the day, we all usually need a good laugh. Hopefully, the above quotes and jokes provided it. If not, there are tons of sites with them, so get to clicking!

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